Unconventional crushes

So APPARENTLY my celebrity crushes are what some would call unconventional. I disagree, but whatever. A sampling:

Neil deGrasse Tyson. Astrophysicist with a voice like butter.

And when he was younger?!?!?!

HOT DAMN.

Dr. Who. There are multiple hot incarnations, but Matt Smith is my number one love you long time. Plus he reminds me of Liebhaber, so....cosplay, guys. I disagree that this one is unconventional but have been in multiple arguments about it so WHATEVS, SOCIETY.

Nikola Tesla. DREAMY

Also, I listen to a lot of NPR and have a crush on the disembodied voice of Peter Sagal. Listen to his show here, but don't google image that ish. YOU WILL BE LET DOWN.


This post brought to you by the loneliness and boredom of spending a week without Liebhaber.

Home Alone 5: Drinking Tea with my Cats

So Liebhaber is in New Mexico for 6 days for a cycling stage race. And I am just hanging out alone. I still just work a ton, so it's fine during the day because I am a busy bee. But at night, I am quite lonely. My cats have had to listen to a lot of one sided conversations.

And it's only been two days.

Tomorrow night I am going to see Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me in the movie theater. By myself. Because I am SUPER COOL. And apparently the few friends I have made in Colorado are not the type to listen to NPR or want to spend $22 seeing a radio show in the movie theater. Aka they are not 85 years old.

Also, to those reading my blog thinking it would be super cool to come rob me or something, I have two cats that will not hesitate to eat your face. Also I have weapons and a lot of pent up energy from being alone for a few days so I will straight up kill you just to have something to do. So, just ponder that.

I still work non-stop to try to afford a house. And that is pretty much it. Boring. I will update you with this exact same post in three months time.

Over and out.

BUY ME A HOUSE PLEASE

I found a house that I fell in love with but it is a short sale under contract, which means the buyer might back out but it's not guaranteed and they have no idea when the bank will decide to do the paperwork and let someone buy it anyway but it is beautiful. Actually it's totally trashed but the floor plan is ideal and it has an great backyard (after I rip out the 8 billion bushes and tear down the haunted shed and cut down most of the unnecessary trees) (before you judge me, it is in the neighborhood that was burned last year so I don't want no stinkin pine trees up against my house, thankyouverymuch) (and don't tell me it's less likely to burn since it just did that I DON'T CARE THE TRESS ARE COMING DOWN) Basically it is a huge house that needs a lot of work but is being sold for a price we can easily afford in a really nice neighborhood, which is unheard of, so I want it. I don't care that all the flooring would need to be replaced, every wall painted, every bathroom redone, the ceiling replaced, the kitchen updated....I want it.

Also when we walked through, someone/something had pooped on the floor and just left it there. Awesome.

It is highly unlikely we will buy this house, since someone already claimed it and we aren't really ready to buy a house right this second. But miracles happen, guys. And I have a lot of really great ideas for it from years of watching HGTV. And now I finally have a reason to use pinterest. Because I have definitely been wanting a reason to do that.

I'm just going to plan my dream renovations and keep bargaining with the universe to let this house be mine. And if anyone out there that is part of the 1% wants to just, I don't know, help me out with the down payment, that would be really awesome of you and I would bake you a cake or something.

Oh, you know, just perpetuating the feminist agenda. Normal stuff.

I watched a great PBS special on the history of the Women's Rights movement in America the other day, and boy howdy, did it get me fired up. Watch it here, at least for as long as it is up. After I watched it, I went to bed and woke up multiple times to tell my cats and sleeping husband things like, "It is literally INSANE that they fired stewardesses at 32!!" and "I'm this close to chaining myself to the white house fence, you guys!" and "Why would anyone fight the ERA? I try to be understanding of people who are different than me but Phyllis Schlafly is quite plainly a crazy person."

No really, I did that. The cats were very sympathetic. Liebhaber snored a few times in what I can only guess was agreement.

I'm dying. Probably.

I've had weird, dull, constant lower abdominal pain for the last month, and it has gotten way worse the last two days and I am not sure what it is but I think it probably is a tumor (definitely watch that link) and I think it's reproductive related because it started on my last crimson wave and the Communists are coming to visit the fun house in a few days time and the pain has exponentially increased and also my back feels like it is going to break and I don't care if that's an overshare because #1 this is MY blog and #2 I'm dying. The logical next step is to visit a doctor but I have a strong mistrust of doctor types overall because of the one time I went and ended up educating the man on the human body and a college student should not be educating an MD thankyouverymuch and also the last time I went the doctor told me I wasn't sick and then I had the worst cold/flu of my life that lasted for 3+ weeks and only had OTC stuff to deal with it because Dr. SmartyPants told me I was just having allergies and also my wallet/pride only allows for one co-pay a year.

(although I would like to say my big brother is going to be the best damn eye doctor the world has ever seen and I will trust him with my vision as well as my life.) 

Unnnggghhhh when I am in pain I just get really pissed off and curse a lot so I apologize for the salty language and surly glares. It's not you, it's the rabid squirrels slowly ripping my insides apart with their tiny, tiny hands.

This is my life now.

Being Mormon and feminist, this is how I feel like I spend 90% of my time.



via

WHAAAATTTT

It's mid february and I have written nothing and I tried to do a tumblr but I couldn't handle all the reblogging, much like my limited activity on pinterest, yet I have nothing original to say and for some reason it makes me really sad that my blog is just sitting here with no 2013 posts and it makes me realize how boring my million hour work week is becoming but I am determined to buy a house asap so basically I will be working every minute I am alive until I get pre-approved for a $250,000 home and then maybe I can think about having a social life.

I did hang out one time with my only friend (SO FAR) in Colorado and it was great but I have this deep seeded (seated? who the hell knows) fear that was planted in 6th grade and flourished over the last 13 years that I have a tendency to be a clingy friend so I can't call her again for at least two more weeks.

Also I have decided that I am neurotic.

Please enjoy this goat video and don't expect to hear from me for at least 6 more months.